Them tears we keep hiding
Will one day burst through the banks
Like a rawing lion
Big and couragess they fall out of your eyes, they flood your face,
Your heart empties out the pain you held in. Because it can’t hold it in
The tears have a place and it’s not stuck inside.
Cry and cry and cry sometimes be it happy tears or sad tears.
It’s OK to feel human, some emotions have no words but actions.
So they say
Can’t burry them
In dignity they killed them selves
For they will burn in the flames of hell.
Well it is written.
So the religious shun the one
Who took their lives.
Not looking into what could have caused this.
Could anyone have helped by just listening.
Could you have held this person close to you.
Why was you so busy trying to speak the words of God but yet your actions are so materially untrue. Did you push the book onto the person instead of listening? Rebuke them and wish badmind onto them?.
Religious sounds inhumane.
You cry for help, nobody helps you take your life and they curse you down…..
So many problems with this world
We follow books written along time ago.
But we can’t live in the reality of today’s world.
Covering up things with other things
Hoping that other thing will be the thing to heal the other thing.
Like a band-aid or a plaster. You see a cut gets covered , I know it’s for health reasons, but some see it as out of mind out of sight. So we start to cover more stuff, with stuff to make the reality of something else feel numb.
Like pain we take painkillers, paracetamol and others. No one talks about the reason for the pain. It’s just go get a painkiller and that’s that. What happend to, let’s talk, why are you in pain? I am no doctor but my time could be apart of you healing. Like do you really need a painkiller or is it easier for me to say it and dismiss convo.
What happend to getting to the root of the problem. The world too quick to find the outcome that we forget the process needed to arrive to the outcome.
Some use drugs and drink to cover up the fact that we have to face reality every day. Is reality really that bad or is it our expectations are a lie that we have been taught to believe in. And that pain really does hurt like hell. It’s the reality in it not being a reality in the world that hurts. We don’t talk about hurt because it’s too real to notice that we are hurting so we hurt others to the point of it becoming normal. Hurt is normal and being happy is weird. Accepting life for what it is makes others weary of you.
I digress will return reached a blockage and not afraid to
Laying on this bed
Waiting to go sleep
Baby snoring in deep sleep
Only time to myself
Tired I am
Eyes burning but I
I write on here instead because
Smaller things sometimes become bigger things.
And they become important
Whereas before they wasn’t.
When you read something where someone expects people to act as if they were living in the bc ages.
I digress eyes puffy tired 😴
Do you know that your flaws
Could be your best feature.
That other people may be insecure with
Themselves in a different way.
So pointing out that you have a difference defines them and not you.
Do you know that standing out is better than blending in.
Being a teenager it’s hard to overstand this.
But don’t worry you will soon see what I can see from here.
It’s annoying to people when you absolutely love your flaws if you believe you have any.
Just being yourself is the biggest confidence that anyone can have.
Bullys have no place if you take the target from them.
Today my flaws don’t define me
It’s just an extra stepping stone.
They asked me what do I look for in love?
I answered to be 15 again to not meet him at Mcdonalds again to not give him
My cherry again.
To look back and climb into a time machine.
To not think that he and us was the definition of love.
What and how do you define love?
I wish my body wouldn’t go all gooey
Like I am drunk.
But you see to me that was love, and for the 8 years after it was. I mean nothing else made me feel all kinds of things.
We connected spiritually eventually and it felt all ludicrous this was not by purpose.
Not sure what purpose
He was like a young boy that
Turned into a man.
He didn’t know his self worth but neither did I.
Long story cut short.
How would I define love.
I guess we touch hands like the aliens on star trek and Intwine our electrons
Connect like satalight dishes.
You kno nothing can define it with words or visions
It should define itself
And when it comes.
No expectations of the passed
Should be presented.
Some answers are a no,
Or you are treated differently to how the person would treat others.
Sometimes you don’t fit in with the criteria.
What is the criteria?
They do not want to be in the same situation as you or dress like you.
Talk over you ask someone else questions of what you have the answers to. Pooh you already helped them out with the situation.
You are wired.
Is she weird? Is she OK? What is she into? Why she single? Weird, Artist weird. Think for herself weird. Frightened weird.
Is she frightened?
I feel sorry for her single mother, I could not be like her, I mean does she no the father to her child?
Maybe we could pray for her instead of ring her or physically help her.
(to her face)
You are doing sooo well, being a single mother a full black single mother. I mean how did you do it? I could not do what you are doing. When will you work? Oh no don’t worry about it you probably don’t want to work.
(back to me)
I’m no mind reader but I kinda get feelings that talk my language I mean is it sooo awkward for people to be straight up instead of trying to be tooo nice it ends up being condescending. Like ooowwereeree uno you could imagine that sound all over exaggeration and squeaky. 💩 it’s OK I quite understand, but perhaps people don’t understand what they don’t understand but still perceive and treat people with ulterior motives. Like why she got that none designer bag. I am like I am working sooo hard that maybe I won’t have to buy one of those bags someone somewhere would gift it to me. The way I dress is not me I’m cacooning like a butterfly. The child thing ask him how he is doing, if he is happy if mummy is happy young children don’t lie much. Especially the real things in life. No sugar coated candy. This is a rant, but people really put on you situations that don’t help you to change in growth at all. Material things and wants are soooo temporary some people assume that you are doing well by the car you drive and the company you have. The reality of deep conversations need to be back. By demand. I write because somone will read and hopefully we can relate. I read blogs because I get to celebrate with people I have not met and I can relate. X